Gameweek 7: The Headlines

You know the great U.S. landmarks: Mount Rushmore, the Grand Canyon, the Statue of Liberty, etc.

But tucked away in Chattanooga is a lesser-known Arsenal bar that you should visit should you ever find yourself in the Volunteer State. It's a place for the Gooner faithful to gather on game day and bond over Mexican and Dorado-style street tacos.

No sausage roll pie and Camden Pale Ale on the menu, but honestly, that's OK with me.

Also, if you're a Tottenham fan, don't come. Nobody wants you here.

JK, but also ... not.

My family and I made an appearance here on Saturday to watch the mighty Gooners smush Southampton. But the Arsenal-Southampton match was just one of many exciting games this weekend.

Let's discuss.

Tottenham's epic collapse

What a hugely entertaining game for the neutral viewer! Not so much for Spurs fans.

Two weekends ago, Spurs players and manager Ange Postecoglou received universal praise after beating Man U 3-0. I guess the real question is how the team who ran the Red Devils off the pitch just 10 day ago let a 2 goal lead slip away against Brighton on Sunday.

In the first half, Spurs played fluid, well-organized football, and looked to be in total control of the game. They scored twice and even had a goal disallowed for offside.

Who knows what Brighton manager-slash-fairy-godmother Fabian Hurzeler said to his team at half time, but maybe someone can pass it along to my (beleaguered) team at work and duly incentivize them, too?

Whatever magic words Fabian uttered, his team was re-energized at the stroke of 45 minutes. Brighton struck back, scoring three goals in ~20 minutes. Spurs never recovered.

For days leading up to the match, The Scout – where I get all my Fantasy Premier League (FPL) news – had been blowing up my phone about adding Spurs players to my team. "Buy Solanke!" they (digitally) yelled at me. "Maddison A Must!" Lolz. To the dudes at The Scout, I can only say, how embarrassing for you.

Also, football is crazy.

"Ange Ball," AKA Tottenham's super-high line, is by nature a high-risk, high-reward approach. While it means the players are more likely to score, it also means they're more likely to concede on the break. I don't think this will change any time soon. Both things can be true at once: that Spurs is capable of incredible attacking football AND incredible defensive fragility.

After the match, Sad Ange told media it was "the most disappointing loss I've had since I've been here." He added,

"It's disappointing. Frustrating. I'm absolutely gutted with that. ... An unacceptable second half. We weren't anywhere near where we should be. Maybe we got carried away with how we were going."

Gordon no good at Goodison Park

Remember when Anthony Gordon was playing at Everton? He doesn't like to talk about it too much, probably because the break-up was acrimonious.

Circa January 2023, Anthony was vocal about his desire to leave his boyhood club behind. He even skipped several Everton practice sessions so that he could personally meet with Newcastle owner Farhad Moshiri amid club negotiations to hash out his transfer fee. When Everton announced Anthony was leaving for Newcastle, the social media message was frosty.

No "we'll miss you, mate!" No "thanks for the memories!" Not even a, "Join us in wishing him well!" Ouch.

Anyway. Anthony's return to Everton's home turf, Goodison Park, as a Newcastle player was always bound to be be cold reception.

When Newcastle was awarded a penalty in the first half of the match, Anthony stepped up to take it. Unfortunately for him, Everton 'keeper Jordan Pickford saved it. The Everton fans proceeded to cheer aggressively as if their team had just scored a goal.

TW for foul language.

Before missing this, Anthony had successfully converted a penalty in the game against Manchester City the week prior. The winger confidently told "Match of the Day" that he had a special penalty process that worked for him. He said,

"I practice a lot. I think coming through the ranks with the England youth teams, the FA brought in a process for penalties so now I have my own process which means basically nothing else matters in that moment except my process."

Yeah, well, he might be adopting a new process now!

Ramsdale's warm welcome at the Emirates

Anthony's reception at Goodison could not have been more different from Aaron Ramsdale's (AKA Rambo's) return to Emirates Stadium.

Gooners know that Rambo – formerly the #1 goalkeeper at Arsenal – decided to leave the club and join Southampton when he lost his starting spot to David Raya. The Arsenal-Southampton match marked Rambo's first time back at the stadium he called home for 3 years.

Nothing frosty here, though. Just lots of love all around.

The Arsenal players are normally super reserved in the tunnel as they march out to the pitch, but (above) you can see the likes of Jorginho, David Raya, Declan Rice, William Saliba, etc. all embracing Rambo.

The Arsenal fans were also incredibly supportive of their former 'keeper. They applauded and chanted his name as he walked out onto the pitch for warm-ups – and at one point, a visibly emotional Rambo could be seen wiping away tears with his gloves.

Rambo previously said that the media comparisons between him and David Raya "used to do my head in." The dudes remain on good terms though, and David was apparently the first person to text Rambo and say congrats after he secured the move to Southampton.

What a class act.

Brentford's opening blitz

Let's stay in London for a moment to talk about another team that's currently excelling: Brentford! OK so maybe "excelling" isn't quite right. The Bees are buzzing around the middle of the table (for now), but they're acquiring a reputation for their lightning-fast starts.

For the fourth consecutive match, Brentford scored within the opening ~90 seconds. For three consecutive matches prior, they'd been scoring in under a minute.

But this time the goal took a little longer – something manager Thomas Frank joked about in his post-match press conference. As he told BBC's "Match of the Day,"

"We've been practicing winning the coin toss all week, and we lost it. That's why it took us so long [to score]."

Hardy har har.

Joking aside, Brentford's opening blitzes are no joke. On a separate occasion, Mr. Frank noted that to score so early in so many consecutive games is a "world record," although you might want to fact check him on that.

In the video below, he justifies it as a world record and explains that he spoke to "our guys" at "Matthew's company," who "analyzed 1 million games."

I don't really know what that means?

Notably, the Brentford-Wolves match hit another milestone as the first game in Premier League history to feature 8 different goal scorers from 8 different countries.

Take a bow, Michail Antonio

While we're talking about goalscorers, I can't not talk about West Ham's Michail Antonio.

West Ham have been cycling through ineffective strikers for years – including so far, their new acquisition Niclas Fullkrug – but Michail has scored 82 goals in nearly a decade for the club. And on Saturday, he scored the fastest opening goal in West Ham's Premier League history.

The Hammers went on to defeat Ipswich 4-1.

Oh, and also! Michail is the club's leading goalscorer.

Put some respect on his name!

Special accolades!

In addition to the aforementioned, there were more special performances over the weekend. Kudos to:

• Bukayo Saka, whose 7 assists (so far) are 2 more than anyone else
• Leicester City FC, who won for the first time this season
• Raul Jimenez, whose crazy back heel assist to Andreas Pereira was a thing of beauty
• Gabriel Martinelli, who scored against Southampton and looks to be getting back in fighting form after last season's slump
• Nottingham Forest 'keeper Matz Sels for making an incredible save to deny Chelsea's Nicolas Jackson the winner
• Cole Palmer, whose trademark "brr" celebration has now transcended football and is being adopted by MLB players

And none for Gretchen Wieners Manchester City!

In the meantime, there's another international break this weekend, so pray that none of your favorites come back sick, injured, or cranky.